Massage Parlor Murders! is fucking great. It delivers on sleaze and stupidity. The death scenes are filthy and crass. The nudity is rampant and gratuitous. The performances are big and stupid.
My favourite moment in Hot Lunch is when Desiree Cousteau and Brigit Olsen trade verbal blows in a battle for the film's (hysterically bland) leading stud. The dialogue has a John Waters-esque filth and absurdity to it. I love it!
The highlight of Hot Vampire is Jim Parker's portrayal of Count Dracula. Parker is undoubtedly the worst Dracula ever shot on celluloid. He grins and stumbles his way through the film like a nervous high schooler with a camera shoved in his face.
My favourite moment of bad movie lunacy in Raw Force is a lengthy party scene, which functions like a collection of nonsensical sketches. It's hard to pick out a single moment from it, but I thoroughly enjoyed this absurd headbutt.
I thoroughly enjoyed the bizarre hodgepodge of horror and softcore delivered by The Jekyll and Hyde Portfolio. Below is a rather fantastic bit of inane scripting where a man of science gives some truly thought-provoking words of wisdom while a police detective looks at the camera nervously...
The Vixens of Kung-Fu had me laughing very, very hard. Seeing its impressive cast of classic porn stars goofily emulating kung-fu moves is quite mind-blowing. The way the film is cut together only makes things more mad.
Those already well-versed in his sadistic stylings of Andy Milligan will lap up Guru, the Mad Monk. It features the requisite mean-spirited dialogue, entertaining performances, sick and silly acts of depravity, and a loving relationship between a mad monk and his hunchback.
Earlier this year, I shared a screamy moment from Dungeon of Harrow. Well, here's another choice scene featuring more screaming, mind-melting acting, and a cute spider puppet.
Nomad Riders kicks off with a literal bang as a gang of bad ass bikers blow up a family. At this point in the film, no context has been given for this act, which makes it fucking hilarious. The bikers then blow up some poor dude trying to use a portaloo. Just for kicks.
I find myself entranced by Dungeon of Harrow, completely in awe of its otherworldly weirdness as I wonder what planet it was filmed on.