The Lords of Magick (1989)
I’ve watched this twice now and I still can’t figure out why it exists. It isn’t the worst film I’ve ever seen, but it’s not far off either.
Granny (1999)
While Granny isn't a good movie by any means, it reminded me of the short films I used to make with my friends as a kid and on that level it won me over.
Final Score (1986)
Final Score is a film on a mission. A mission to deliver more punches, kicks, broken bones, dead stuntmen and exploding houses than any other movie, and I think it might just have succeeded.
Hollywood Cop (1987)
RAPING, ROBBING, KIDNAPPING, KILLING... THE ACTION NEVER STOPS. This is the tagline that’s proudly displayed on the poster for Hollywood Cop, so my expectations were pretty high already.
Roar (1981)
Roar took eleven years to make. It wrapped in 1981. Tippi Hedren divorced Noel Marshall in 1982.
Calamity of Snakes (1983)
Calamity of Snakes is a strange beast. On the one hand, it's kind of incredible with scene after scene of amazing set-pieces, but then you remember that you're watching hundreds upon hundreds of snakes being massacred and you start to feel depressed.
The Roller Blade Seven (1991)
After a lifetime of being brainwashed by Hollywood into thinking we know what a good movie looks like, sometimes you just need to see something so radically the opposite of professionally made to realign our karmic balance.
Russian Terminator (1989)
Russian Terminator is a film that kind of defies description. There is a ninja, but in no way could you call Russian Terminator a ninja film. Also, there aren't any Terminators in it, although there are at least two scenes that rip off The Terminator
Conquest (1983)
Conquest, for all its flaws, is actually kind of a good film. It's entertaining and certainly never boring. For Fulci fans I'd say that this movie is surprisingly essential if only to see the man's unique style in an unexpected setting.
Special Silencers (1979)
I've learned to expect certain things from Arizal: indecipherable plotting, terrible acting, hilarious scripting, ridiculous hair, sweat, comedy villains, funky music, explosions and insane stunts. And while Special Silencers delivers on all counts, it ups the ante by adding something new to the repertoire — Gore.
John Virgo: Playing for Laughs (1993)
I'm the first to admit I watch some garbage, but rarely have I watched something so bad that I felt completely ashamed of myself for owning it – however this, ladies and gentlemen is hands down the worst thing I've ever owned.
