Cyber Ninja (1988)
The plot isn’t what matters in Cyber Ninja. You aren’t strapping in for a tale of woe and familial bonding, you wanna see a robot ninja kick in the collective shit of dozens of faceless bad guys and a gigantic, building sized cannon blowing up a fortress.
L’exécutrice (1986)
Brigitte Lahaie is a tough as nails cop who has to take down a gang of snuff and bestiality producing pornographers after they kidnap a girl. Cue gun fights and lots of running. So obviously with all that in mind, this is fucking amazing, right? Uh... well...
Ball zap
Someone getting kicked or punched in the balls automatically makes a movie better. An inappropriate laser-zap to the balls makes a movie a must-see.
Shut your HOOOOOOLE!!!
Hell Comes to Frogtown doesn't quite deliver on its promise of "Rowdy" Roddy Piper pounding his way through hordes of mutant frogmen, but this moment almost makes up for that...
A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors – French poster
In our final Wes Craven post for the week, I give you the glorious French poster for A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors.
Finger lickin’ good!
Though Wes Craven's Shocker doesn't garner the same respect as A Nightmare on Elm Street or Scream, it's a hell of a lot of fun. Here's my favourite moment, which, though sadly trimmed by censors, packs a painful punch.
The best fight scene in cinema history
I now know, having only seen six minutes of The Instructor, that it is the greatest film ever made. Watch as karate king Bob Chaney delivers some of the most laboured kicks and punches captured on celluloid.
School Spirit (1985)
We'll never get a movie like School Spirit again. And while that's probably a good thing, it's hard not to enjoy its total lack of scruples and singular goal to titillate and entertain in the trashiest and cheapest way possible.
Lifeforce – Japanese poster
Lifeforce is known in Japan under the more exciting title Space Vampire. There are a lot of great posters for Lifeforce, but I think this is my favourite.
Don’t Panic – Polish poster
Is this really a Polish poster? It's certainly not the sort of imagery that springs to mind when I think of Polish posters. Though I suppose it is well past the golden era for Polish poster art, not to mention it's for a low-budget Mexican slasher.
Brainblast (1987)
Junkies, dodgy video effects, and a guy in a frog suit making out with a woman. Hello, Brainblast.